We've got a fax machine, you're in big trouble now
That's right, nations of the world. We've used some of our riches to buy a shiny new fax machine and a satellite phone. We are totally going to spam you now.

So when your children sob, wondering why all these random pictures of Greek hostages keep showing up in your home office, you tell them it was us.

When your workplace grinds to a halt under the weight of our taunting cartoons of Harry Potter being eaten by a bear, know that it was us.

When your military crumbles as all communication lines are stuffed with our recipes for Injera, know that it was us.

And when you look for us, to retaliate, know that you will not find us, as we are everywhere and nowhere all at once, out on the high seas.

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It is one our beloved national dishes. It is often served with rice sweetened with the blood of our hostages. So make sure you pay up!



2009-04-16 12:30 am (UTC)

I don't believe you.

How would you keep the paper from blowing all over the place on your open-air speedboat, HUH??

We're not stupid, you know.

You think we're so backwards we haven't discovered the paperweight yet? Shows what you know.

We actually have a set of really nice Andy Williams paperweights from Branson, Missouri.

We've got a fax machine, you're in big trouble now


2009-04-18 11:54 am (UTC)

all you need now is something to say, and clean paper to print on.

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