This week on “Megatron or Martha Stewart?“, try and guess who said this:

“I have learned that I really cannot be destroyed.”

ANSWER: Martha Stewart

All Your Base Are Belong To Google

Well done, Mr. Headline Writer Guy

Apparently there’s a new teen pop act creating a stir. Two 13-year old girls comprise Prussian Blue, and they have their own adorable gimmick. And that gimmick, of course, is white supremacy.

Yes, instead of singing about boys and clothes, they sing about the aryan race. There’s just something really really odd when teeny boppers sing about ancient viking warriors. And it would even be funny, if it wasn’t so fucked up.

One last Breaking Bonaduce post. This episode, episode 6, was the first one where Danny is actually in better shape at the end of the episode than he was at the beginning (he checks into rehab). Alas, it looks like the rest of the season will be a long downward spiral towards sobriety and happiness.

In the meantime, enjoy this quote from the beginning of tonight’s episode:
VH1 Camera Guy: What is the recommended dosage of Vicodin and how much are you taking?

Danny: You’re supposed to take 1 tablet every 4-6 hours as needed; that’s what it says on the label. [Pause]
And I’m right on schedule - if it were 7 days from now.

Here is one of my favorite recent BitTorrent finds. For those of you who can load MIDI files onto your cellphones:

666 Metal Ringtones

I highly recommend:
Megadeth - Holy Wars
Pantera - Cowboys From Hell
Misfits - Last Caress
and, believe it or not,
Black Sabbath - Neon Knights

On my roadtrip I heard a song called “Call Me By My Name” by David Allan Coe. I thought it was swell, so I included it in my little zip file of music from my trip. Of particular note are the lyrics, the best of which are below:

CHORUS (SUNG):
So I’ll hang around as long as you will let me
And I never minded standin’ in the rain. No,
You don’t have to call me darlin’, darlin’
You never even call me, I wonder why you don’t call me
Why don’t you ever call me by my name.

BRIDGE (SPOKEN):
Well, a friend of mine named Steve Goodman wrote that song
and he told me it was the perfect country and western song
I wrote him back a letter and told him it was NOT the perfect
country and western song because he hadn’t said anything about
Momma, or trains, or trucks, or prison, or gettin’ drunk.
Well, he sat down and wrote another verse to the song and he sent
it to me and after reading it, I realized that my friend had written
the perfect country and western song. And I felt obliged to include it
on this album. The last verse goes like this here:

LAST VERSE (BACK TO SINGING):
Well, I was drunk the day my Mom got outta prison.
And I went to pick her up in the rain.
But, before I could get to the station in my pickup truck
She got runned over by a damned old train.

Just in time for christmas! Buy this game for your favorite young girl. In fact, buy two just in case she loses the first one.

Turn the volume on your computer off before following the link though, or your life will be ruined forever.

Here’s a good article about the Mutter Museum in Philly. Go see it.

Behold, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher’s Jewish Wedding.

The next time Britney Spears gets married, I hope it’s a Jewish wedding. Actually, I’d be very entertained if everyone started having Jewish weddings. Maybe Dick & Lynn Cheney can renew their vows in a Jewish ceremony or something.

What’s not to like?

And now, the Yankees have been eliminated! Yay!

I can rest easy now knowing that although the Mets will not win it all, at least the Braves and Yankees are out of it. I think I’m rooting for the White Sox to win the series now. Something about the Cardinals rubs me the wrong way. I think it is residual 1987-related hostility (go ahead and look up the NL East race in 1987 - look up the name Terry Pendleton - feel my 10 year old sorrow).